I cannot reproduce any problem with the feed cache not updating it updates as expected in my testing.
I could possibly add a config setting to allow you to disable the caching of the blog feed output.
But in general feed aggregators I have seen and used including google reader do not update in real time but on a periodic basis. First because its rude to keep requesting the feed of a site over and over in real time causing exaggerated load on the web site, its much better manners for a feed aggregator to just check periodically. Its no different on sites like Weblogs.asp.net they aggregate but not in real time.
Showing videos and other rich media in feeds is problematic from a security point of view. No external feed should be trusted and NeatHtml will remove such things. I will investigate the possibility of a setting to disable NeatHtml in the feed manager for those who want to do this.
Currently the only way to make it real time and allow rich content like videos is for all 5 users to use the same blog and put that on the home page and show the authors name next to each post.